Apple Will Make You Pay… If You Let Them

Apple Pay

As part of today’s underwhelming shennaigans at Cupertino one thing stood out for me, even above the ludicrous sight of people hysterically applauding a product as if their favourite sports team had just won the title.

And that was the claim that Tim Cook wants to replace your wallet with Apple Pay.

How does he back this claim up? Well, Apple have iNnovated, yet again, by introducing NFC to their phones, you know, the tap to do stuff everyone else has got.

But Tim has taken it a step further, oh yes. He’s leveraged the blind and financially infirm institutions belief that Apple has such a HUGE market share and is SO important that they MUST be dealt with.

And some very important tests and stuff have been carried out.

Leaving aside the fact that there’s every chance your iBattery will die at the crutical moment, the bit where it all starts to crumble is when reality bites.

Electronic transactions exist because some partners make small amounts of money every time a transaction is processed. These amounts can be tiny, but it doesn’t matter because they happen millions, even billions, of times a day.

So, those that believe Apple are more important than they really are honestly haven’t grasped the fact that their market share is dropping like a stone.

Which makes these transaction nunbers a little smaller than first expected.

Add to that the fact that after the initial hype of today the Emporers New Clothes are set to be revealed for what they really are and that outside dedicated iPhonians not many people will REALLY care for a bigger version of the same old thing and it just isn’t happening long term.

Not that it will anyway.

Apple can’t even keep a few photos private.

Companies who went iPhone are being hacked at an alarming rate.

If you trust them with your bank details and credit card nunbers I’m afraid someone will pay heavily.

And it won’t be Apple, not at first.

You will have used it wrong, you see.

You probably followed the instructions they provided.

And that, as we saw with the #Fappening seems to be the worst thing you can do.

I’ll stay nice and safe thanks.

I’ll stay with BlackBerry.


Bigglybobblyboo is a legend almost nowhere at all. He is a founder member of UTB and spends his spare time taking out his anger at the world with a fishfork and a spatula. He is also a Cribbage Master, having won 1 fight online as the other guy refused to turn up out of fear for his life.

  • Blackjack

    After I Cloud hacks I am quite ready to hand over my wallet to Frapple. Who wouldn’t?

  • BB Racer !!

    How many times have I left my $300 sports watch at the gym, at somebodies home etc… ? Now I have to worry my whole life info will be left behind !!!

  • xBURK

    After today’s announcements, it’s more than clear that Apple will continue to put a strangle hold on its customers. News such as needing to purchase an iPhone6 to use the iwatch is a kick in the teeth. Like they couldn’t find a way to make this work on older devices? It all adds up to a company I would never trust or want to be associated with. Seriously, if this is not enough to wake people up, nothing will.

    • Blackjack

      I heard it works with iphone 5 but still…its an iphone.

  • ital1

    I assume that this can only be used with the 5 series and up is due to a hardware limitation?; as in the M7 chip found in the 5s, and the M8 chip in the 6 series, being required? With that being said, knowing Apple, this was probably done to cause a wave of upgrades of 4 and 4s users into either the new/old 6 or to sell off unsold inventory of 5 series devices. The fact that you can’t use the watch without having the phone doesn’t surprise me in the least bit.

    • xBURK

      First of all, it was announced that the iwatch will only work with iPhone 6 and up. Nothing was said about 5? I believe this was clearly done to force people to purchase the new phones. Now, of course I could be wrong, but I highly doubt it.

      • ital1

        I could swear I read online 5 and up.

        • Blackjack

          I read that also – USA today I think

          • xBURK

            I heard this twice on the news today. Could be wrong information transmitted? I’ve seen that many times, lol.

  • ital1

    Which devices work with Apple Pay?

    Apple Pay works with iPhone 6, iPhone 6 Plus, and Apple Watch (paired with iPhone 5, iPhone 5c, iPhone 5s, iPhone 6, or iPhone 6 Plus).


    The most incredible thing to me is how virtually all of the media press has allowed itself to be co-opted into being a marketing tool for Apple. From local radio and TV to the major network broadcasters, the ‘not quite a launch’ of apple products was breathlessly reported like it was real, important news. And not one of them told the truth about these products and nobody took Apple to task for announcing products and not being able to supply them. Can you imagine what the press would be saying about BlackBerry under the same circumstances? The media is completely brain washed and have submitted to the almighty Apple.

    Talk about a cult.

  • Great article Biggs. Thanks for the reminder that their market share is dwindling. They cannot control everything the way they used to; the large retailers and manufacturers of accessories won’t allow it. I don’t see how the banks or cc companies will go for a proprietary-Apple solution for phone payments either- it’s in everyone’s best interest to utilize a universal tech for phone payments.

    I was astonished to see how uniNnovative their new phone is. They’re screaming about features most of us have enjoyed for a year or years.

    I really believe their ability to totally dominate the story and determine the narrative used by the media is dwindling. By the time Chen is ready to give BB a voice in the marketing and PR wars, and the battle for mindshare and control over the perception of the various brands and devices, he will deal a knockout blow to Apple and they won’t be able to come to market with such fanfare over a completely lackluster device.

  • Blackjack

    I will still be using the amazing Debit Card technology. All you have to do is swipe and enter a pin. It costs nothing and if you lose it, report it it gets locked and you get sent another one.

    And nobody can hack it, nobody can access it with a near field hacking device , and you don’t need a smartphone, you don’t have to keep it charged,

    Its wonderous.

    • razrrob

      This brings up a good point BJ- in the typical Debit Card transaction there are typically two intermediaries involved. With NFC there are up to 6 intermediaries-

      who’s going to pay for that?

  • Blackjack

    I read somewhere that Target will be supporting this Apple Pay. That’s very reassuring, since they were the “Target” of other hacks.

  • shanerredflag

    I feel so…so…innovated. BHAAAHAHA

  • razrrob

    Nice one Biggs!

    I think we need to refer to this as “Pay Apple” as opposed to Apple Pay