Apple Will Make You Pay… If You Let Them

Apple Pay

As part of today’s underwhelming shennaigans at Cupertino one thing stood out for me, even above the ludicrous sight of people hysterically applauding a product as if their favourite sports team had just won the title.

And that was the claim that Tim Cook wants to replace your wallet with Apple Pay.

How does he back this claim up? Well, Apple have iNnovated, yet again, by introducing NFC to their phones, you know, the tap to do stuff everyone else has got.

But Tim has taken it a step further, oh yes. He’s leveraged the blind and financially infirm institutions belief that Apple has such a HUGE market share and is SO important that they MUST be dealt with.

And some very important tests and stuff have been carried out.

Leaving aside the fact that there’s every chance your iBattery will die at the crutical moment, the bit where it all starts to crumble is when reality bites.

Electronic transactions exist because some partners make small amounts of money every time a transaction is processed. These amounts can be tiny, but it doesn’t matter because they happen millions, even billions, of times a day.

So, those that believe Apple are more important than they really are honestly haven’t grasped the fact that their market share is dropping like a stone.

Which makes these transaction nunbers a little smaller than first expected.

Add to that the fact that after the initial hype of today the Emporers New Clothes are set to be revealed for what they really are and that outside dedicated iPhonians not many people will REALLY care for a bigger version of the same old thing and it just isn’t happening long term.

Not that it will anyway.

Apple can’t even keep a few photos private.

Companies who went iPhone are being hacked at an alarming rate.

If you trust them with your bank details and credit card nunbers I’m afraid someone will pay heavily.

And it won’t be Apple, not at first.

You will have used it wrong, you see.

You probably followed the instructions they provided.

And that, as we saw with the #Fappening seems to be the worst thing you can do.

I’ll stay nice and safe thanks.

I’ll stay with BlackBerry.


Bigglybobblyboo is a legend almost nowhere at all. He is a founder member of UTB and spends his spare time taking out his anger at the world with a fishfork and a spatula. He is also a Cribbage Master, having won 1 fight online as the other guy refused to turn up out of fear for his life.