An iBeacon In The Night Or A Flamethrower At The End Of The Tunnel?

I Do Enjoy A Good Read...
I Do Enjoy A Good Read…

So here I am pondering over my next blog when over BBM my good friend Bigglybobblyboo passes your dear Reverend a link to check out an article, and, with the kids dropped off at school, I settled into my leather backed chair and thought, why not…..?

Well!

Seems Apple are looking to make tracking sheeple a whole lot easier!

It’s called iBeacon.

iBeacon is an indoor positioning system that Apple Inc. calls “a new class of low-powered, low-cost transmitters that can notify nearby iOS 7 devices of their presence.”

Yes, my Applonian brainsuckers, thanks for that, but I pretty much know where I am when in a building  and with Apple Maps being as good as they are your caring Reverend would advise you, my friends, to stick to thinking for yourselves…

Imagine the trouble you’d be in if you trust an iPhone to tell you where the toilet was?

No spouse is happy when their partner is blindly going to the toilet in their wardrobe…

On the plus side, my beautiful congregation, iBeacons could send you notifications of items around you that are on sale or items you may be looking for……

WOW! this is going to be great! I don’t need my eyes any more!

I trust iPhone to tell me where everything is, what to buy, where to buy it and when to buy it!

It will even let me pay for it using my phone!

I don’t have to worry at all, as soon as a new iPhone comes out I will have my phone tell me, march me down to an Apple store and get the new one…

That is, of course, as long as no one has hacked the one I’ve got and spent all my money, sent all my pictures to the NSA who already know what I’m doing because the iBeacon has lit up like a Christmas tree or my new Ferrari told them last night (see my 2nd blog) – you know what?

I’d advise you to forget it. You don’t need some flashy new Bluetooth igadget, Ive got NFC, have you heard of that Mr. Cook?

All the new, exciting phones have it………Oh, except one or two…….

Oh and something else about this Bluetooth thing, many years ago I had a Nokia, and do you know what i used to do with it? Hijack peoples phones over Bluetooth, make em ring, send texts and once I had finished playing silly sods with other peoples phones I would send control back to the handset…. which was now useless because the owner wasn’t fluent in Russian or Arabic!

I want SECURITY Apple and nothing you come up with is showing that’s what you want for customers, before you come up with these new fangled and, lets be honest, not innovative at all ideas, why don’t you concentrate on keeping your customers safe, the sheep will start revolting, and if they go elsewhere it wont matter if you have something truly innovative, no one will be there to have it!

Still, my dear, dear flock, that’s why the Reverend Grim is here. To guide you one the righteous path, away from the deceivers who want to take what is yours and give it away.

And back to those who don’t.

And that’s why your Reverend says #iChooseBlackBerry10

Anyway, that’s it from me for now, don’t forget my BBM channel C000117D3

Oh, and for more fun and games do remember to sign up to the UTB forums by clicking here:

UTB Forums

Come and have a chat with me or any other of the UTB bloggers.

I’m waiting to ‘assist’ you sheeple….

Rev. Grim out!

 

Reverend Grim

Who is Reverend Grim? Not many people know. He has a channel on BBMC C000117D3 where he smites the rotten Apple. He has a photographic channel too C0045B753 seeing as he's actually a photographer. All we know is that he preaches the safe, secure word... BLACKBERRY and BB10! He will welcome anyone #BacktoBlack and into the United Temple of BlackBerry for a sermon and a cup of tea, even Brad who doesn't understand a word he says!

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